Observations of a new dad

After 12 days we’ve learned a few things about me.

I’m less nervous than I thought I’d be, at least when I’m actually taking care of Peter. If he needs to be changed, I change him. If he’s hungry, I can either feed him or help his mom feed him. Whenever he has a need I can fulfill it, or at least try. I might get it wrong, but being able to do something instead of just worrying makes things go a lot better. That’s generally true in all things in life, but when you have a little baby entirely dependent on you, shedding the nerves is a great boon. However, when I’m at work or away from him for any other reason, I miss him (and his mom) like nothing I’ve ever felt before. I worry at times like that that maybe a grizzly bear will break into the house looking for a pic-a-nic basket while I’m not there to defend him and his mommy. Why? BECAUSE IT COULD HAPPEN!!!

I’m eating better, too. In times of stress my metabolism changes and I don’t eat as much as I normally do (but I’m ok, so you don’t have to try to force feed me if I get like that). The weeks surrounding Peter’s birth were like that. Yesterday, though, I was hungry all day. Today is pretty much the same. Now I understand how Peter dislikes it. Although, honestly, if someone held me and bounced me while I ate I’d probably throw up.

I’m developing baby-hauling muscles now. Carrying the filled car seat and keeping it aligned so he’s out of the sun, and all the comfy-for-him arm positions while he’s in my arms have started giving me a different muscle tone in certain spots. However, my legs are still skinny. That’s not going to change.

I’ve been out of the house several times now since we got back from the hospital. Unlike Peter, I still don’t like crowds all that much. I think I’m too old to change. Oh well.

I’m still working on this fatherhood thing, though. I think I’m doing ok, but it’s still so new I can’t say for sure. I haven’t given him a book of matches or anything like that, so I think I’m passing some basic tests that any idiot could. But I hope I can do better than just any idiot. I want to be an exceptional idiot.