Monday, April 30, 2007

It's now April 30th

Peter is due today. They say only 5% of babies actually come on their due date. But what percent is breech at this stage? 3%. If we can do 3% we can do 5%, right?

His head is still up, though...

Sunday, April 29, 2007

So that's what happened Friday...

Why does this strike a chord with me now?


To think I said he'd be born today...

We’ve spent the past couple days trying to convince Peter that he wants to flip upside down. We had another visit to the chiropractor yesterday, and this morning we tried moxibustion with an acupuncture practitioner. Everyone knows moxibustion, right? Good, that’s what I thought.

Peter is still an active little guy in Mommy’s tummy, but he seems to like his position just fine. He shouldn’t, but he does. All the techniques we’ve looked into seem to have the success stories coming in the 32nd-38th week of pregnancy, whereas we’re knocking on the 40th week’s door. What that means is we have our work cut out for us. I’ve tried softly rubbing Mommy’s belly in the direction we want him to turn. He seems to like it, but whether or not it means he wants to go with the flow of the rubbing or just stay in place for a nice in-utero massage remains to be seen.

This has also turned into a strange weekend for us technologically. Our DSL went dead yesterday morning, and a service guy came out when we were getting ready to go to the chiropractor. He found that the problem is inside the house (“Get out now!!! The problem is INSIDE THE HOUSE!!!") and was going to change the ancient, painted-over phone jack when I told him we had to be 20 miles away in about 20 minutes. He left a new jack for me to install (successful!) and we flew out of the house. This morning our cable box gives us some weird message, which, after a call to the cable company meant, well, the problem was inside the box (“Get out now!! A technician can’t get there to replace the box UNTIL TUESDAY!!!”). I’m sure our toaster will start burning “666” into our bread now, too.

Now we go back to positive thinking and encouraging Peter to go for a spin. Again. C’mon lad, you can do it…


Friday, April 27, 2007

A short narrative

So yesterday morning (Thursday, four days before Peter’s due date) we have a “routine” doctor’s visit to make sure all is ok. Everything is fine and dandy until the doctor says “that doesn’t feel like a head” while inspecting Peter’s Mom. “I think we should do a quick ultrasound and make sure.” So we move to another room and out comes the cold slime for the ultrasound zapper to roll over Momm’s belly easily. What does the screen show? Peter’s head, up at the top of the womb instead of down at the bottom where it’s supposed to be. That means he’s breech. That’s bad.

The doctor explains what can be done, and terms like “c-section” and “inducement” feature prominently in the talk. I am proud to say I managed to say “I’m feeling lightheaded” before suffering the indignity of passing out then and there, and I’m prouder to say that I sat down and was fine. But the discussion went on, and the basic consensus was that we’d come in Friday morning for an External Cephalic Version procedure, but get booked for a possible c-section if that didn’t work. External Cephalic Version (AKA “Version”) means someone tries to push the mother’s belly to get the baby in the right direction, which sounds easy enough, but if the baby has dropped into the cervix he has to be pushed up, then spun, and then pushed down.

Leaving the hospital we decided, well, maternity leave starts now. We each went to our respective offices, collected whatever stuff we needed and headed for home to figure out what the hell we were going to do. Peter’s Mom was sharp enough to call our Hynobirthing practitioner to see if there’s any alternate things that we can do, and after a while she said there’s a chiropractic procedure that can help get a baby to move into a head-down position, and a previous client of hers is a chiropractor, and she talked to our group at one of the sessions about the help she got from Hypnobirthing. Writing it down now makes it all seem so convenient, but what do I know? Anyway, we called the chiropractor, and she could see us at 4:00. We went home for a little while and tried some tricks to get him to move, but he wasn’t in the mood, I guess.

We drove out to the chiropractor and we told her about what was going on. She said we should try to get any procedure postponed until Monday to let the chiropractic adjustment have some time to work. What it does is loosen up and align the pelvis so if anything is tight or lined up the wrong way the baby would have a much easier time doing his spin. And if you’ve never seen your very pregnant wife get chiropractor-ized, it’s… well, something I don’t need to see again. But we made another appointment for Saturday morning for a follow-up in case we’re able to, and the need is still there.

Mommy felt better afterwards, and she called the OB to see about what HAS to be done, and when, and what MAY be done, and when. After the talk she felt ok with doing to the version at the hospital, but if we can work around a c-section and buy some time we’d do that, too.

This morning we got up, ready for, and at peace with, whatever would come our way. Our primary concern is doing what’s in the best interest of Peter, and if it’s safest and best to do a c-section, so be it. If he can be moved to the normal position, great. So we crammed the car with all the stuff we thought we’d need in case it was Peter’s birthday and headed off to the hospital.

Mommy got an IV stuck in her arm (and it was done very well, no “oopsies!”) and the monitor tentacles strapped to her belly to keep track of Peter’s heartbeat and Mommy’s contractions. She was later given a shot of something that makes her uterus muscles relax, so it would make it easier to manhandle – er, adjust the baby in her belly. They then slimed up her tum-tum and did another ultrasound to make sure he’s not being a tease. His head was still up, so Peter experienced his first bout of wrestling. I suppose I should be proud of him, because the little guy won and the doctor admitted defeat. The down side is he’s still up.

Mommy took the lead in pursuing a delay in the c-section. One of the doctors said she’d go check the schedule. Putting it off until Monday to allow for a natural flip would not be a problem, but if labor starts while he’s still like that it would still have to be a c-section. She came back saying that the only time they currently had free was next Thursday at 7:30 AM. A week to move him? We’ll take that.

So now we have another appointment with the chiropractor tomorrow morning. We’ll be trying to figure out a way to move him until Thursday morning. We’re going to try everything we can. Everything legal, I guess.


Wednesday, April 25, 2007

Back to normal

So La Mere de Pierre felt better this morning and has rebounded from the fatigue which afflicted her yesterday. We got some take-out Thai food for dinner in hopes that spicy food might cause things to speed up a little. It didn’t work, I guess. He’s still making himself comfortabe in Mommy’s womb. Oh well.

The forecast for weather this weekend is very nice again like last week, which means today is wet and dreary. So there’s an open invitation for him to make his debut on a beautiful day.

Tuesday, April 24, 2007

A beginning? Or a false alarm?

Peter's Mom didn't sleep well last night (actually, I didn't either, but I'm not lugging around the next generation in my belly), and she also felt nauseated. She had neither vim nor vigor, nor even any pep. I don't remember who suggested it, but she stayed home this morning to see if she could recharge her batteries. Meanwhile, at work I had the attention span of a sugared-up mayfly. Eventually lunch time came and I raced home to check on her. She was still pretty tired. So I tell her to stay home the rest of the afternoon since she wouldn't really be all that with-it in her condition. Fortunately she didn't put up much resistance to the idea, but she did say that she needed to be productive and clean up some more. "No. Rest. You need all the energy you can muster when you go into labor." I come home to find that she did rest, and then she made rice krispy treats. I won’t complain. At least it wasn’t cleaning. She does feel better, thankfully.

She hasn't had any tell-tale signs of labor yet, but I did notice that her belly was sloped differently than previously yesterday afternoon. The top of the bulge of her belly had been almost parallel to the ground before, and now there's a gentle decline. She was always carrying high before, so I don’t know if Peter will drop any further that I can tell. He could be in exit position, or maybe not. This is my first time, so what do I know?

Now, will we be able to sleep tonight? Hmmm…

Monday, April 23, 2007

reconnected

Now what is the point of having a blog about impending fatherhood, if a week before the due date your internet connection goes dead? Our DSL went on vacation about mid-day Saturday and was gone all Sunday too. What if something happened? I’d have to just remember until I get access again, like now.

So, what was I not able to report as it was occurring? Well, tidying, cleaning, scrubbing, vacuuming, clearing, dumping, recycling and a little resting. But no laboring. So we are left with it being 7 days to the ETA and a disinfected domicile. At least the weather was nice.

In the laundry this weekend was a stuffed-animal-like ball that had some bells inside it (I tell you, everything was cleaned). The sound it made while in the dryer was like we kidnapped one of Santa’s elves and tossed him in. I’ll have to remember to put it back in again in December when the Christmas overload gets to be too much and I need some vicarious relief from the constant barrage.

And now we procced on the ultimate week. Nothing is planned except a doctor’s visit. We just gotta wait…

Thursday, April 19, 2007

The latest scoop

We had a doctor’s visit this afternoon. The doctor said that from the current progress that it should be another week before labor. Also that he’s at least 7 pounds now, and can grow half a pound in a week - but she wouldn’t be surprised if he was 8 pounds.

Remember: Daddy is betting for next Sunday, with a weight of 7 pounds 14 ounces. C'mon Pete! You can do it! Woooooo!



11 days to go

I didn’t post anything yesterday because, well, it was quiet on the baby front. Mommy slept well, but she did get pretty tired during the day. She wonders if it had to do with reading some of the relaxation materials at mid-day. Could be.

The crib mattress arrived yesterday, though. That was pretty fast - I wasn’t thinking it would be here until Friday at the earliest. Now we’ll just have to make it look nice for Junior.

The bag is still unpacked. I keep forgetting to bring it up from the basement. The contents are ready to be put in to it, mostly. It’s just the actual luggage that I have problems with.

We have another doctor’s visit this afternoon. Hopefully it’ll be as easy as all the other ones.

Memo to Peter: The weather this weekend will be nice and warm. I’m sure you’d like it.

Tuesday, April 17, 2007

Another day closer

Now there are 13 days until the due date. Last Friday was Friday the 13th, but nothing happened. When I was an athletic youth I liked to have 13 as my jersey number. Even my birth date makes 13 (1 + 3). Yes, I like the number 13. But I don’t want Peter’s Mom going into labor today. Why? Well, remember the bag? It’s still in the basement. The car is back from the shop, and purring like a big Swedish kitten now, but I didn’t put the bag together when I got back. Totally forgot about it.

So of course, Peter’s Mom didn’t sleep well last night, and then this morning she says she’s experiencing pelvic discomfort. I remained calm (if not a little slack-jawed) then grabbed one of the tomes on pregnancy looking for the early signs of labor. I took the class, and I knew what the signs are, but at 6:00 in the morning it helps to have a little assistance. It’s not like her water breaking - I mean, that’s an easy sign, right? But from the looks of it it’s not labor, just the boy doing his thing. Maybe moving downwards (“lightening”), maybe punching her in the liver or another sensitive organ, maybe he’s doing his impression of a bull in Pamplona...


yeah, I love that picture…

But it wasn’t labor! Besides, today doesn’t work for me. I have to get my hair cut tonight, and I’m way too shaggy at the moment. If Peter came out with my hair like this people would assume his name would be “Groovy Butterfly” or “Moonflower Lavender” instead of Peter Charles.

So, he can’t come out until I pack the bag and get a haircut. And do some laundry. And hang the wall art in the nursery. And…

Monday, April 16, 2007

The Sweet Spot

2 weeks to go. This is it. When they give you your due date they say labor could start any time 2 weeks before or 2 weeks after that day. Now we are 2 weeks before D-Day. Commence pacing!

We have things for the “the bag” out and ready to be packed, except the bag is still in the basement (which, by the way, I cleaned up nicely a few weeks back. Not that the boy will be visiting it any time soon, but he can rest assured that the basement was in order at some point). I’d have it in the car already, but it’s going into the shop today for a tune up, and I just don’t like the idea of leaving it in the car while it’s being worked on. Because, you know, the bag will be so heavy that it would make it harder to lift the car to do the work.

We ordered an organic mattress over the weekend for the crib which will be here in about a week. Unlike the common mattresses available everywhere, organic mattresses are made out of sprouts and wheat germ. And instead of waterproof vinyl sprayed with fire-retardant chemicals, the outside is covered with a gigantic leaf of cabbage. We could have ordered the bok choy covering, but the cost of importing it from China wasn’t really worth it. And when Peter’s big enough for a proper bed, we can compost the mattress.

…So it’s about noon now. No call from the missus saying “it’s time.” Waiting bites.

Sunday, April 15, 2007

The Titanic sank on April 15th, y'know

April 15th - tax day. It's also 15 days to our due date. That sounds kind of neat, but also kind of lame, like the thing an expectant father would say to make the day before the 2 weeks before the due date day sound somehow more snazzy.

I was advised this morning by a friend in-the-know (that is to say she had 10 kids years ago) to just go in early and drop off Peter’s Mom at the hospital and get it over with. I’m not sure our insurance would cover that, but I will give it some thought. I’m not sure what I’m supposed to do after I drop her off, though. Go see a movie? Golf?

We did have a doctor visit Friday. Nothing to report from it. Ho hum. 

Wednesday, April 11, 2007

A Beautiful Spring Day


Well, there’s a winter storm starting out there today. They say we’re supposed to get up to a foot of snow by tomorrow morning. Maybe. It is April in Wisconisn, after all. But it will be nasty out today and tonight, and no one should want to have to drive anywhere. With that said:

dontgointolabor dontgointolabor dontgointolabor dontgointolabor dontgointolabor dontgointolabor dontgointolabor dontgointolabor dontgointolabor dontgointolabor dontgointolabor dontgointolabor dontgointolabor dontgointolabor dontgointolabor dontgointolabor dontgointolabor dontgointolabor dontgointolabor dontgointolabor dontgointolabor dontgointolabor dontgointolabor dontgointolabor dontgointolabor

Our Father, who art in Heaven, dontgointolabor.

Hail Mary, full of grace, dontgointolabor.

Yea, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of snow, dontgointolabor.

Hallelujah. Hosanna. Amen.


Hey, did you know there were 10 Patron Saints of pregnancy? That sounds inefficient. Maybe some downsizing would help increase production and reduce the red tape...

Meanwhile, 19 days left until the due date (18 if my psychic powers are to be believed).

Friday, April 6, 2007

An OK Friday

We had the first of the weekly doctor visits this morning. It’s Good Friday, there were only 2 doctors there, and we were the last scheduled appointment of the day at 11:30, so we got through it pretty quick. All is well, so nothing to report other than the doctor congratulating Peter’s Mom for still having ankles.

They also got a blood sample from her finger to test something to do with hemoglobin. She passed, and I didn’t pass out, so we both did well, I guess. I’m not a wuss, mind you, but real blood – right in front of me – can make me a little squeamish. Fake blood is no problem, because it’s fake. Guts for that matter, too. You could show me some gory schlock movie and I probably wouldn’t bat an eye. Show me a paper cut and I get light-headed.

I’ll be fine for the delivery, though. I gotta be there for my wife. However, if it was anybody else I’d be as tough as wet kleenex.

Actually, hospitals themselves make me uneasy. Well, older ones anyway. Usually they have that all-white, linoleum-floored, fluorescent-lit look to them. “Antiseptic” does not really equate with “comforting.” From what I remember of our field trip in birthing school, the maternity rooms are much less cold in appearance. At least I hope that’s it.

Wednesday, April 4, 2007

A matter of individual taste?

Something I’m going to have to get used to is the popular culture of Peter’s generation. Not that I’m totally out of touch with what entertains infants these days, just that I’ll have to adjust to being exposed to it constantly. Take Barney, as an example. I can tolerate that for short periods at a distance. What if Peter demands Barney all the time? Teletubbies would be ok (the bright colors and simple naratives stimulate my brain), but Barney? Just the idea of that makes me think of getting rid of the TV, or at least keeping it off whenever he’s around until the age of 16. If he wants to watch Barney at 16, he can do it all he wants.

We got a Baby Einstein CD a while ago - Baby Beethoven, I believe – but we couldn’t listen to it for more than about 20 seconds. It had about 20 selections and has a run time of about 30 mintes, so each piece is about a minute long. But it sounds like it’s played on a jack-in-the-box. If I want him listening to Beethoven, I’ll just get the real thing (not the real Beethoven, he’s dead), or if I want some electronic version of Beethoven I can play the soundtrack from A Clockwork Orange for him. Well, maybe not. Still, this baby-fied stuff was crap. But what if he likes snippets of symphonies played on a jack-in-the-box? Wait a minute, wouldn’t that just encourage him to have a short attention span? Oh dear…

I’ll be fighting a losing battle in a way. I’ll want to protect him from things that freaked me out as a kid (the Wicked Witch of the West, Oompaloompas, Canadians), but he’ll probably be immune to that stuff anyway due to parental antibodies passing to him in the womb. He’ll probably wind up being freaked out by things that I wouldn’t be inclined to think are freak-out-worthy, like black and white television because it’s not HD and everyone looks gray. Come to think of it, that does sound disturbing.

Tuesday, April 3, 2007

The Curse of the History Major

One can not think of the end of April wihout thinking two words. “Easter Bunny”? No. “Spring Break”? Nope. “Baseball Season”? Not even that. No, the words that should come to mind are these – “Adolph Hitler.”

Yes, Adolph Hitler. Born April 20th, and comitted suicide on April 30th. Now, if Peter is born on his due date, it would at least be the anniversary of Hitler’s death, which is considered by the sane to a good thing, relatively. Personally, I’d like to avoid any date where there’s some Hitler-y connection. So if the April 29th prediction is correct we’ll be ok, I think. If he pops out 10 days early, though, we’ve got problems. Me, I share a birthday with Victor Borge, Victoria Principal, and Mel Gibson. It would be hard for me to tell my boy that he shares his birthday with Mother Angelica, Joey Lawrence, and, y’know… Hitler.